Honeymooners in Africaland

I’m back! Thanks for waiting oh so patiently, undoubtedly with bated breath, while I gathered my thoughts and put my affairs in order for my next big trip. Sure, it’s been over 2 years, but I’m sure you’ll agree that your chronic blue face and massive neuronal necrosis was worth it, for I have news of a trip of epic proportions. This puppy registers a 9 on the Richter Scale of Journeys, or, for our Irish readers, the Awesome Sauce O’Meter (ASOM). It was evaluated AAAA++ for creditworthiness by Standard & Poors, and it was rated a 98 by the International Wine Association, particularly praised for its acacia notes, hints of banana, and lack of Ebola.

What sort of trip could receive such accolades? Why, a trip to Africaland, of course! The Nations of Notions; the Continent of Continence; South America’s Former Siamese Twin.

That’s right: Laura and I had a voucher at the Honeymoon Store, and we splurged on a 3-week extravaganza 7000 miles away from home. While we certainly considered many far-flung and exotic destinations (like Fiji, Madagascar, and the Younger Land of Zea), Ethiopia and Tanzania eventually won our hearts.

What exactly drew us thither? First, Africa was a place that always intrigued us for its bounty in both culture and flora/fauna. You can’t deny that some of the most traditional cultures in the world live among its 53 nations, some of which still live in hunter-gatherer societies largely untouched by the West. Similarly, our favorite animals that we’ve seen in National Geographic, on the Discovery Channel, and in the Lion King (I’ll be honest, this was reason #1 that we went to the Serengeti in Tanzania) beckoned to us so strongly that they made the Sirens sound more hoarse than an old hag who eats tomacco by the bushel. And Africa has three amazing geographical features that we have heard so much about: the Sahara Desert, the jungles of Congo (with the great apes), and the Great Rift Valley. Ethiopia and Tanzania are two prime examples of the last formation, which results in an amazing landscape of an ever-rising highlands (we’re talking easily 7,000-12,000 feet) with a spreading lowlands of dramatically low proportions (2,000-4,000 feet). To boot, this was the site where Homo sapiens first evolved!

Not only that, but, as a runner, I have always been enamored with the people of Ethiopia and Kenya (not so much Tanzania, but they are growing in prominence) for their extreme prowess in distance and middle-distance running. Laura, too, did some research and discovered that Ethiopia was one of the cheapest, friendliest, and safest places on Earth. So with these points in mind, Laura and I set out to plan the Trip of a Lifetime: Honeymoon Edition.

Now that we are halfway through Phase 2 of the journey, in the next post, scheduled for release tomorrow, we will recap Phase 1, titled “Ethiopia: The Original ‘No Land for the Timid’ (Sorry, Alaska).”

Enjoy this picture as a teaser: It was taken on the final day of our cycling trip in Ethiopia, and if you look closely, you can see a little yellow dot on the road, which would of course be Laura!